I know I’ve done this post just with a different name many times, but I actually mean it this time. I have a pushing force behind me this time whose telling me what to do (boyfriend)
I’ve always had some self-confidence or self-esteem issues. I know it’s a problem, and I’ve tried working on it, but it always seems to resurface and hurt me. I can’t say I’m depressed or that I have anxiety issues. I beat myself up a lot and I worry. When I say I’ve tried fixing it, I’ve only tried talking about it. That’s it.
How I beat myself up:
- When things go wrong, I blame myself. Thoughts like “It’s my fault.”or “I caused it.” pop in and take over.
- I say bad things about myself. When I get into a sad mood I say stuff like “I’m dumb.” or “Who would want to be with me.” or “I’m not good at anything.” and I want to prove to myself that I’m wrong. I want to find the things I’m good at, I want to prove to myself that I’m smart. I want to live a good life.
So I want to be better. And I think talking about my feelings would get that speed bump smaller. Another big thing is living better. I want to have a clean room! I want to eat healthier! I want to exercise more! So I have a small plan leading to a bigger one overall.
- Go through my clothes and downsize
- Set a schedule when to clean
- Save money by buying groceries and skip the McDonald’s
- Set a day where I’ll exercise once a week
I’ll update you guys on my process of this, with a post every once in a while, I promise!!
I guess it’s time to start living better…